August 8th, 2026
Yesterday morning, we drove to a jobsite in Texas where are oldest son, Hans, was pumping concrete. He operates a huge pump truck. It has eighteen wheels, weighs about 185K lbs., and has a 57-meter boom on it. He had been working at the site since 2:00 AM to pump a 600-yard concrete slab for a new hay barn. Karin, Asher, and I got there at 8:30, and his crew wasn’t even close to be finished with the job. Hans had asked us to come to the site to see what he does for a living. He seldom does jobs so close to home. It’s nothing for him to pump concrete as far away as Dallas, or Houston, or Port Arthur. Since yesterday’s job was only about ten miles from our hotel in Madisonville, he figured it was a rare chance to see him in action.
We did not actually go into the jobsite. If you aren’t wearing a hard hat, you shouldn’t be there. We could see Hans in the distance. He is instantly recognizable even at 100 yards away. He was walking around slowly and with a slight sag in his shoulders. He waved once at us and then went back to work. He looked tired, extremely tired. I can identify with that.
I worked as a supervisor on the dock at a trucking company. For about twenty years, I worked third (graveyard) shift. During many of those years, my wife and I had small children at home, which meant that I was always sleep deprived. Like Hans, I tried to sleep before my shift started, but that seldom worked. I was dead tired and wound tight simultaneously. I often self-medicated to function, but that was unhealthy for me and my family. Even when I was physically at home, I wasn’t really there. However, I was the sole breadwinner in the family, and we needed the money that I earned.
Hans is in a remarkably similar situation. He doesn’t even have the luxury of having a set start time for work. He gets called by dispatch a few hours before his job is set to begin. He sleeps at random times, and he sleeps poorly. He is taking care of his family financially, but there are significant downsides to his line of work. He honestly loves pumping concrete, and he is good at his job. It is the erratic schedule that is slowly killing him.
When I was working on the loading dock, I was operating in a brutal environment. The temperatures on the dock were exactly the same as the temps outside. It was hot in summer and intensely cold in winter. My job required me to function under severe time constraints. I had to think on my feet. It was also literally dangerous on the dock. I had my right leg crushed by a forklift in 2009.
Hans’ working conditions are not much different. He works in extreme heat. His work is hazardous and physically demanding. His job is stressful. He has to get his job done while following a rigorous schedule. Everything is time sensitive.
I wonder why Hans and I have followed such similar career paths. It might be just bad karma. However, I think part of the problem is that we are both veterans. We have traits that draw us to work that, quite honestly, kind of sucks.
I will make some gross generalizations here. Veterans tend to be mission oriented. We just want to get the job done. We like unambiguous instructions and goals. Give us a clear set of orders and set us loose. We are used to working in difficult environments under pressure. We expect things to go sideways and we plan accordingly. We can be part of a team, but we prefer to work alone. We have limited social skills.
So, where do we wind up? Hans and I found work with companies that needed people who could work under stress and still get the job done. I really wish that Hans had found a different path, but he didn’t. The cycle just keeps repeating.
Frank is Emptiness 